For Some Things, It Is Too Late

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I read a thoughtful article in last month's Oprah magazine: "To-Do List, Or Not To-Do List?", by Martha Beck. In it, Ms. Beck examines the experiences that "waste our time and drain our energy." Naturally, I'm interested, as I am a compulsive list-maker as well as an occasional time-waster.



Ms. Beck's thesis: it really is too late for certain mindsets, and for activities that rob us of the opportunity for happiness. While we make our to-do lists, whether literally or hypothetically, let's sort out the fruitful activities from the frustrating ones.



It's too late in our lives, for example, to live for "ego candy": that's anything we do simply for status or accolades. Oh, yes, I have done this: chosen something on my to-do list just because it will elevate others' opinions of me. The author advises us to apply the following test to any experience we think we "should" have (for me, to read War and Peace, e.g.):

Would I want to have this experience even if no one else would ever know I did? Would I be thrilled to do this even if everyone I know thought is was stupid?

No War and Peace for me, not this lifetime.

It's also too late, the author says, to "turn toxic people into healthy ones." She advises us to spend less time with the "Lucy's" who inevitably pull the football out from under us, and more time with those who show love and support.

My favorite "it's too late" is: "It's too late to feel guilty about enjoying simple things." If meditating, playing with the cat, or reading thrillers brings you joy, do those things now. Our bucket lists don't have to consist of all Important Things. Reading blogs, for example, or staring at the ocean are among my great pleasures, and it's too late to feel guilty about them. Why not be happy now? It's not too late.



Have a glorious Tuesday,